BLOG 6  4.8.2020

The Starfish Effect”

So today the first day after the full moon, I have decided to try my hand at blogging! I started a blog in 2016 which I published on my older website, which have now been included on the new website. At that time, I didn’t have any real understanding of what a blogger was, what is its purpose, why I would write one, what my intentions were and outcomes might be, how it could serve myself and others, or indeed, why I would write one in the first place.

So after this revelation this morning, I did a little research into the history of blogging and its subsequent development on the internet and going forward.

I was guided to two very good articles and   Thank you to these authors.

So I set to and set myself a task of answering some of the questions and comments raised in the two articles, which really focussed me on my intentions for the coming time.

It’s not that I don’t have anything else to do. I have so much! Those of you who know me either as family, friends or friends on social media, know that I actually am, mostly always, creating something, be it a music track, an album, a painting, a garden, looking after my mama. Some of you say “you’re amazing”. The “amazing-ness” is the God-spirit, Universal Energy or Power coursing through me, as a vehicle to illuminate my mind and potentially yours, to light up the fire within, so that we can live as authentically as we can as beings on the planet for a short while. I do not make any claim to the amazing-ness. I see it as a gift, one to be treasured, handled with care, and most importantly, to be shared.

Some of you may also know my seminal work “Yogaflows” published, to great acclaim in 2002. See my first website which has now been retired and remains only as a “static internet site” now included for posterity (!) into as a form of reference or archival value.

Over the years of personal yoga and meditation practice, of personal western-style therapy and many more forms of self-inquiry, alternative therapies, trainings in yoga, massage, tai chi, qi gong, long stays in ashrams, yoga communities, sitting with “enlightened” masters, and more lately, online yoga classes and meditation sangha.

These experiences always led me to write. I wrote since very young. You know, for some us, it started with teenage journals. The thread (see a future post of the same name) was always, the need or the desire, or both, to write, to record, to hear my own inner voice through the writing, even if no one else heard it or read it. I needed to express myself, although at the time this was only an unconscious evolutionary impulse or urge. Ironically, I failed my English language ‘O’ Level no less than twice, succeeding on the 3rd time! That time, at secondary school, was heavy with unexpressed grief, inner turmoil, and total loss of identity after the very sudden and early demise of my beloved Daddy at age 11. Life took a most unexpected and painful turn, and it would never look like what I would have wanted it to ever again.

I have been working so hard on the new website recently, that my energy was quite “mangled” up yesterday. I began questioning what, was the purpose of a new website. My hand had been forced, when the platform I previously used for my then two separate websites, was decommissioned. I had to decide, do I want one, or not? Why? What for? I had, for a while, now, as I moved into a more eclectic synergy of my creative talents, that merging the two into one would be more sensible, feel more organic, and bring myself into balance with all the aspects and gifts I have been given to share. It was time. And then wait. Embracing the Pause.

So back to writing. This morning the day when I decided I would take the rest of the week off, the morning after the most wonderful connection with my students out on Chingford Plain last night for our second Tai Chi – Qi Gong, outdoor class. 

The communication between us, mostly silent, yet potent, nature holding us with the protection of trees, walkers with dogs, families with children, teens laughing and rolling around playfully on the grass, the world was a wonder to behold. I felt so different. We were all held in our grass circle. I was shown who I really am, through the mirror of nature, the stillness of the evening, the birthing of the full moon, the touching of the feminine and the groundedness within us all the beneath our feet, I realised and felt my purpose. To Be THAT which nature is, natural, organic, real, flowing, moving and bending with the elements, no resistance, no barriers. I had forgotten, momentarily, crouched behind a computer, on a chair, losing sight of the “pause”, often so pregnant with possibility.

So I feel, I have potentially been given the outlet of blogging, to share with you, whomever you are, my experiences, a little of my life stories, which may throw light on some of yours, to bring my website to life, through the writing, and as I write I feel the flow of creativity coursing through my fingers, that I can hardly keep up. How so? I feel you all out there you are with me now, as I write. What an interesting and rather curious and potent sensation this is. My purpose amongst others, is to inspire, to inform, to educate maybe to engage in an interactive process through comments, discussions, to provide tools for outreach and insight, to whet people’s appetite for more , all of which have their own legs, and to also forge a path to my new books, ready and waiting for publication at some point. The blogs may serve as an introduction to what may come either in hardback, kindle, download, who knows. The writings may take us to different places to explore, to expand, to inform, to enjoy and to live more vibrantly, more joyfully.

I leave you with this little teaching story, which I heard many moons ago, I don’t recall when or where, or who told it. So I call it “The Starfish Effect” and the reason I share this is to remind myself, that it is ok to start at zero, to write and be with as little expectations and conditions as possible, in everything we do and say, create and how we choose to live our lives.

A young boy was on a beach. A crowd of people were in the distance walking along the beach. They saw the boy moving, running on the sand towards the back of the beach, bending down, running rapidly towards the sea, lifting up his arm, making a gesture, then repeating the whole process over and over again. He was tired, wet and covered in sand and seaweed, yet determined, one-pointed, resolute.

As the group of people approached, they saw what the boy was doing and also they saw the beach was scattered with large dark objects. As they got nearer, they saw the objects were beached starfish.

They saw the boy was running to pick up one starfish after another, running back to the sea and throwing them back in so they survived. A man in the group, laughed out loud, and shouted arrogantly over to the boy “forget it boy, there are so many, it won’t make any difference”. And to that the boy replied, standing near the water, all the while holding one starfish high up above his head, as he threw the starfish into the water, retorting, loudly, and boldly “to this one it will”.

Herein lies the moral – for me if my actions, writings, songs, paintings, teaching, books, can inspire, help, make a difference, stir to emotions and more, then my work is done. It is such a wonderful principle to live by. Let us release any expectations, conditions or attachments to the outcome of our thoughts, words and actions. Living in the moment with the compulsion to act when necessary, and to hold back, equally, when the inner voice moves us to.

Blessings to All