RENÉE CHATLANI – SHE TEACHES ME
My Mama – my infinite teacher of art. Since her passing in October 2021, My brother and I collated all Mama’s artwork, sifted through her various portfolios, and discovered many art works we had never seen before. I then cleared her home, and most of the paintings come back to my home or to my brother Ram’s home. Over time, as I navigated the intense grieving process, I was fascinated, and astonished at Renée’s talent, precision, detail, colour palettes, her eclectic portfolio of so many varied subjects. Yet growing up surrounded by Mama’s art, it became “part of the furnishings”, with no great attention being given to them. It was only when I began painting seriously in July 2017, that I realized what an amazing talent and gifted artist she was, and how challenging drawing and painting is.
Over the last year, my “model of mourning” has manifested in curating all her artwork into portfolios, then onto my website. This is still a humungous task – consisting of digitally photographing Renée’s original non-digital photos of all the pieces she had sold – rough count – around 400-450, uploading, cropping, resizing, categorizing, cataloguing, searching for owners of some of her work to get photos, measuring, pricing , and more – and yes the shop is coming!!
One of the sketches we found fascinated me. Where did these ideas come from? I was inspired to paint my impression and version of this in oils. This began a journey into my own grieving process, as this first painting morphed into a series of 12, called “The New Path“.
On the left is Renée’s sketch mentioned above . Here is “Nous Deux” by Mohini
I am now led from within, initially to “copy” some of Mama’s paintings. I now see from the first attempt that mine is not so much a copy, as my impression or version of hers.
Enter The Teacher : when I look at these two paintings side by side, I see my errors, in visual perception, spacial awareness of the subjects the landscape, colour, perspective, distance, precision and maybe more. This is a very exciting discovery : the teacher comes to me in the presence of my beloved Mama, from the heavenly realms, to instruct me, and to help me move from the internal expression of grief, to the external expression of mourning. Thank you SO much dearest Mama.
Left/1st – “Workers Break”, by Renée SOLD Right/2nd “Workers Break” by Mohini
©Mohini Chatlani. January, 2023
I am deeply moved by your sharing Mohini and the way in which you are transforming your grief into mourning . At the same time honouring your dear Mama as your teacher but also reclaiming your inner artist and teacher too . So very beautiful 🙏🏽💜
Thank you so much Rita for your encouragement and kind words. Much appreciated. With love and blessings, Mohini 🙏🏽💜
Mohini,
Your beloved Mama would be so proud of you.
Grief is so debilitating, yet you are finding your way through, slowly but surely. You are courageously tuning in and allowing your Mama to help you heal and to continue to be an inspiration on your own life journey.
God bless you on this painful yet wonderful road of discovery.
Xxx
Thank you dear Danuta for taking the time to leave this rich comment. You are no stranger to grief, and your deep understanding and honouring of your own grief has underpinned and blessed your life. Blessings. Mohini
Your Mum’s paintings are very impressive Mon. That deep connection must be very powerful, and a way to experience the grief, at a painful but very profound level. I guess that’s the place we need to be living from now.
Mohiniji, Thankyou for your heart’s sharing, and the love flowing – grief can be such a transformative experience, thrusting us through portals, into new dimensions of intimate communion with the Divine. In that intimacy, I feel we can sit with the unfolding process of mourning, and receiving, of the grace that comes in the wake of earth-side dramas. Thank you for feeling into the heart craft of your Mama and attuning to the flow of art that is evoked from your own journey… watching the daughter and mother, the student and disciple express in one huge harmonious smile. May she continue to bless and inspire you with her presence, as she lives on through and with you. Love and blessings, Ruth
What a lovely sharing Ruth. Thank you so much. Your continued friendship, understanding and knowledge always shines a light on this journey we are all travelling on. Namasté. Mohini
🙏🏽🙏🏽
What a beautiful thing to do Mohini. I love the way you’re discovering your art through your mother’s, she certainly had a talent. Your art is influenced and yet you’re finding your own path and expression, beautiful. The grieving process is hard and this way of dealing with it is inspiring.
Dear Amanda, thank you for your kind and generous comment on my process here. It is most valuable and necessary for our grief to be witnessed and artistic endeavours do provide a tangible vehicle to move from the internal process of grief to the external “model of mourning”. “Grief is what we do on the inside. Mourning is what we do on the outside” – David Kessler http://www.grief.com. Many Blessings. Mohini
Wonderful insights, my dear Mohini.
Our greatest teachers especially those who rear us, guide us and love us. Most are ever more with us, as we discover our selves over time.
Dear Friend, thank you for your kind comments. To realise who our teachers are, in the form of those, as you say, “rear us”, it is so necessary that we do the inner work, to become so aware that the “teacher” is right in front of us. And yes, once we “see” them, we do begin that extraordinary, and often painful journey of self-discovery. As you have said and I have concurred – we need not search anymore – to belong outwardly to any faction, group, or other. We belong only to God. Blessings to you. Mohini
Beautiful words my dear Mohini and a such a moving tribute to your dear Mama.
Love and blessings.
Marina
🙏💗
Thank you my dearest Marina. Blessings to you. Mohini 🙏💗
Thank you for sharing this. Your Mum was an amazing, talented woman. It’s a gift to see the world through Renée eyes, the journey continues.
Thank you dear Rhonda. It is such a blessing to continue to share Renee’s life, talent and being with those who were the closest to her. God bless you always.
I am always astounded by your talents and creativity dear friend, and how wonderful, that within your incredibly painful grieving process, you have created the most amazing legacy for your Mama. Within that legacy, the actions of your Mama are certainly alive and thriving in you, and what a special relationship you still have, expressed quite clearly through your ongoing art work.
“Roots never broken, love never ends.
From mountains to stars, our atoms are one.
It defines our legacy and the mark that we leave.”
Hirendra Kumar Meyer
With love as always.
Dear Andrea, thank you for such a rich response to my post. It is indeed those who feel deeply, see into the innate wisdom and move from the intuitive place within, who can really see all the parts in an integrated whole. Blessings upon you.
Dearest Friend, What a deeply touching tribute to your beloved Mama! And what a very, very special relationship you had! How wonderful that her paintings and your paintings are so interwoven! So much love and beauty is shining through! I see her smile and I see how she is shining through your heart! I really feel deeply touched by your loving, graceful and creative way of keeping her spirit alive! May our grief and loss be gently transformed into loving surrender. Love and love to you and your mum!
Thank you dear Angelika, for your very generous and heartfelt comment, on my latest blog. So much appreciation and love to you. Mohini xx